Trust, commit, delight, and rest in the Lord.

Natural History Museum

Photo Credit: Alex Tuten :)

We had a patient, knowledgeable (Mr. Worldly Wise) young man for a docent...but oh my goodness.....what a bunch of BALONEYPOOPOOGOBBILYGOOKNONSENSE!!!!!!

Still had fun though. And, lots of opportunities to discuss.

Image found on Lisa's blog.

Little Desire That Could

You know how we all have this undiscovered piece of us deep down inside. This place where something private lives?

We all have at least one of these...I'm sure.

It's the set aside spot reserved for something unrealized. A desire. A potential. A dream.

Something that remains unexposed maybe due to insecurity or fear...maybe due to being smothered by life's circumstances or quieted by time. Hushed. Lulled to sleep.

While traveling through an extended period of deep reflection with Bradley about our future...trying to discern best what the Lord would have us be doing w/whatever time we have left on this fast rotating sphere and how best to set the kids onto the trajectories they are supposed to be on...it got me to thinking...which got me to a place of articulation.

As fumbling as this attempt might be...here goes.

I've always had a secret desire to act. To be an actress. In front of a camera...acting. When I was young...it seemed somewhat impossible. When I got a bit older...it seemed like it was something that might actually happen for a moment and then...fleetingly....it slipped away again. Not the deep down desire. That did not go away. But the possibility of it being played out in time and space did.

Even so...I find ways of nurturing that Little Desire That Could.

I remember things I learned during my many years on sets & back lots. I recall the two television seasons I spent as a teen-ager working in a casting director's office on the Universal lot...reading others who were auditioning for sit coms. I think back to my private lessons with Nina Foch in her Beverly Hills French maison and how she taught me to do the exact opposite of what I was doing with my vocal inflections. I recall what Lilian Chauvin whispered to me about character in her thick intense accent while studying in the sun room of her eclectic Beachwood Canyon bungalow. I recall as if it were yesterday... the USC scene study and improv classes I never once dreaded attending. A meeting with the casting director... and then a callback... and then a one on one with the director of Less Than Zero. I remember crying during the audition because that was what was called for...except I was really crying....because somehow....I had lost my fear and didn't care whether or not I got the job...but it all made sense. The story...the dialogue...the character. I got it. It was a breakthru moment for me...as an actress. There were a few breakthru moments. I never shared them with anyone...for they were private. I'm the only one who ever knew I had them.

All this to say.... they weren't for not. They weren't wasted experiences. I bring these and other experiences with me to this day.

For instance, I tend to dramatize when I teach Literature in our co-op . Most of my students would most likely say that they have seen glimpses of my "dramatic side" when discussing The Princess and The Pea, Mr. Popper's Penguins, Lord of The Flies, Les Miserables, or A Tree Grows in Brooklyn.

And, my kids...well, they get me just as I am all day long everyday. So...I'm pretty sure each one has.... to some degree...picked up on my love of character, story and acting by osmosis. Watching a film around here is never quite as simple as that.

Life happened all those years ago and things went in a different direction. I married an actor...very passionate about acting. My focus shifted to story telling. Similar thing...different avenue. Still very motivated by story...by character. Also...Photography found me. Again, similar thing....different avenue.

Rambling....I know....stay with me.

I have no idea if I will ever have the opportunity to act anywhere other than in my very own kitchen....but I do know that the little spot inside me has never faded. I also know that I was/am called to nurture and support a very similar albeit stronger (furious/burning) spot in my husband and to pass down passion to our children by example. I am to encourage those who have little spots of their own.

And, I am convinced that if all we ever get to do is pass on the love of a certain something which is lovely to another...well then, that's a worthy thing.

Believers...glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

He created you and He created me w/certain gifts, talents, and abilities. He is a good God. He instructs us to obey. So stay close to Him and do whatever it is that He is telling you to do. Do it when He's telling you to do it and in the manner He is telling you to do so.


Are you brave enough to speak about your secret spot out loud? You do know that the Lord already knows it's there, right? He knows all about it.

A blog called Generation Cedar. As in Cedars of Lebanon.

Sometimes the Lord just blows my mind. He is such an encourager...using Jasmine this time.

City Island

Andy Garcia had some good advice for us when we were a young married couple...expecting Braverijah. "You will never be ready."

And, I'll always remember that he would not do anything acting wise that would be dishonoring to his wife.


This film was fun for Bradley and I to watch tonight. Made us lol a few times.

The last scene was such an encouragement and ever so prophetic.

This truth hit me hard this week.

When we are hurt by something/someone...validation of those wounds goes a long way in the healing process.

We have trouble healing when we are not heard. When our wounds are dismissed... ignored...justified away...mocked.

How many times, Lord have I made it more difficult for my children to heal and grow because I wasn't willing to validate them due to my own arrogance and pride?

When conviction comes...repentance follows...then trust....and restoration.

Thank you, Lord for gifting me with children who know how to forgive.

Parenting...not for the faint of heart.

photo by Cate Johnson


A group of European women who gather frequently to gossip openly about the neighborhood while sipping percolated coffee from china cups and consuming mass quantities of strudel.

Usually up for discussion?

Those who are obviously on benders.



Photo by Dawn Gregg

The status of being bent for more than a day. Usually results in loss of memory, money, strange tattoos, and other things you'll have a hell of a time explaining.

This is an example of the sort of people whom the Lord has chosen to surround me with. I love Him for that.

If you find yourself craving Biblical teaching...have a listen to this.

Possibly one of the most touching and inspiring moments I have ever seen captured on film. Made me cry. Made me laugh.

PAUSE my Music Player first.

Rosh Hashanah

John 1:29

Be still my heart. One of our 5 kids' password to something is.......


.....get ready....


wait for it.......


godlovesmesomuch


That is the sign of His goodness I've been pleading for. Also....that another kid was taking notes during today's sermon. Also that two other kids showed up. Also, that the other one....sits quietly and listens...then applies sometimes.

Isaiah 58:11

And the LORD will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.

Johnna reminded me of this fact.

I think I would just lay down and die w/out my friends. Jeni's post reminded me to remember how much I am loved by Him thru them. As did Lisa's.